Debutante Brawlers (44) def. Tai Chi-tahs (32)
Trauma Queens (25) def. Debutante Brawlers (19)
Tai Chi-tahs (23) def. Trauma Queens (20)

The weather might have been less than great, but that just means it is more important to get hot food to the people in our community who already struggle under better conditions. The Carolina Rollergirls and a host of loyal, charity-minded fans braved the near-freezing rain to raise money for Meals-on-Wheels in a three-way, round-robin charity tournament featuring all three of the home teams.

Cowboy

Pirate

Ninja

Pirate, Cowboy, Ninja

You've played Rock, Scissors, Paper before, haven't you? I'm sure you have. As we head into the tournament my thoughts are that the teams are relatively balanced. There are some issues... injuries, attrition, etc. but on the whole - relatively balanced. Personality-wise, however, the teams are very different. It's odd how it can happen, but it does. People start to look like their pets and derby teams adopt a general personality. Now, what I'm about to say doesn't hold for every person on every team - there are exceptions - but the general feel of each team is the same.

A simple American variation is Pirate, Cowboy, Ninja (Cowboy beating Ninja, Pirate beating Cowboy,
Ninja beating Pirate). This version is performed with the players starting standing back to back,
taking three paces in opposite directions and then turning and revealing their choice.

- From the Wikipedia article on Rock, Paper, Scissors

photo: sam bennett

Debutante Brawlers

As the best blocking team in the league, the Brawlers are clearly the rock. They've got a bit of size on the other teams and some strength/technique in the hitting and blocking departments. They are measured, almost lazy - but I'd call them efficient. The Debs make the most of their assets in careful, deliberate ways. A no-nonsense, almost professional attitude is how they approach the game. Other teams may try to crack the wall, but they are remarkably solid physically and mentally. Rock - but we'll call them the Cowgirls.

The rock does have a bit of a crack in it - injuries have robbed their team of Kama Suture and Eva Lye. And attrition from the last season has them short a few skaters. They'll be skating this event with one substitue each from the Trauma Queens and Tai Chi-tahs. Get your pink on ladies!

photo: sam bennett

Trauma Queens

The Trauma Queens are all about kinetic energy. They don't skate fast, they sprint. A few solid blockers and some finesse players round out the team, but in general they are a physical, sharp team. The jammers try to blow through the pack like missiles. Rocketts, maybe. In the land of RoShamBo, they are the scissors. Don't skate around the other team, skate through them. Athletic, sharp and pointy. Scissors in the traditional game, here they are the Pirates. Heck, the new TQ artwork looks alot like a Jolly Roger.

As the season starts, the Trauma Queens will have more skaters on their roster than any other team. They have a wealth of talent and should do much better than last season. They were close in all of their games except in the one stat that matters most - wins. This season though they should have everything they need to win.

photo: sam bennett

Tai Chi-tahs

Smaller, more agile and flexible... the Tai Chi-tahs are the paper in this game. They are generally smaller on average, but size isn't as important to the ninjas of derby. A jammer-heavy team, the Chi-tahs have just enough blocking to maintain pack-control long enough for the stars to zip, dart and dodge through the pack. Tonight will be challenge for them though, as they are without Julie Jawbreaker, one of the most brutal blockers in the league. Without her there to open holes for the Chi-tah jammers to break through they will have a much more difficult time.

Fittingly, the Chi-tahs took the rink and threw origaimi stars into the crowd. Paper, of course. In our world though, they can only be the Ninjas.

Cowgirls versus Ninjas

Coming off the interleague season undefeated, you'd think the Carolina Rollergirls were coasting on a winning-high. In reality there was an undercurrent of nervous tension... and it didn't take long for the crowd to realize that no one was pulling any punches. They may have been nice to each other when they were playing Sin City, Providence, Arizona, and Charm City but the brass knuckles and claws are about to come out.

I'm a jammer ref this period, watching the Tai Chi-tah jammers. This will be different, as I rarely jam-ref during bouts (I actually prefer to ref the pack). The period starts with everyone being a bit tentative and three points for each team on the first jam. Then the world exploded as Teflon Donna and Betty Rumble exchange huge multi-pass jams, quickly pushing the score near the 20s for each team.

Brawler pivot Ms. Fit attempts to hold back Chi-tah jammer Princess America.  (photo: sam bennett)

As the period continues, the Chi-tah jammers seem to be having a binary relationship with the pack - either they are making it through for big points or getting nothing. The teams are also getting used to their new line-ups and the Chi-tahs seem to be having some specific issues with their helmet covers and penalty management. If you've read my recaps you know I hate it when a jammer gets a fourth minor; it's sloppy and costs your team valuable points while allowing the other team to increase their score.

Both teams are working a bit better on their defense with a series of low, single-digit jams. The Debs are really good at protecting a lead though and are also making it through the pack more cleanly. The Tai Chi-tahs may be breaking out first, but it's the Brawlers getting lead. I can remember one jam clearly where Princess America makes it through the pack but is constantly checking to see if the Brawler jammer gets lead. She does and Princess immediately removes her helmet cover, beating the whistle to call off the jam. I knew it was coming, she knew it was coming, and sure enough it happened.

The Debutante Brawlers are simply frustrating the Tai Chi-tahs with their size, strength and blocking. One more big jam and the Brawlers take the period by an even dozen points.

• Eris Discordia jammed 4 times with a 100% lead-jam percentage, scoring 16 points.
• Teflon Donna jammed 6 times in the period and lead with 23 points.
• Maddat-U and Violet Femme were the lead blockers for the Chi-tahs with 7 and 9 blocks respetively.
• Blocking was the real forte for the Debs however, with Kitty Crowbar leading the way at 12, followed by Teflon Donna and Ms. Fit each with 10.

Debutante Brawlers 44, Tai Chi-tahs 32

Pirates versus Cowgirls

Winless in 2006, the Trauma Queens enter this period itching to prove themselves. They should really see a doctor about that itch.

Brawler Ms. Anthrope makes a block on Queen jammer Zella Lugosi.  (photo: sam bennett)

Their first opponent will be the Debutante Brawlers - and this period I'll be the jam ref for the Debs. The Debs seem just a hair fatigued, espescially the skaters that haven't been bouting constantly over the last four or five months. The rookies look spent, the skaters that took some time off look a bit hollow.

Unlike the first period that featured a huge explosion in points, this match-up is far more defensive. The Queens are good blockers but exceptional pure-hitters and seem to have a lot more energy as a team. There's only one high-point jam I can remember featuring two titans of the Carolina Rollergirls facing off against each other (Roxy Rockett and Teflon Donna); the bulk of the other jams are quite low with a handful of 0-0 jams.

The Deb jammers are trying as hard as they can, but seem to be getting stuck in the pack. While there, the Queens are dishing out some harsh medicine and ultimately the Brawlers can't take it. The last jam of the period sees Teflon Donna in her last appearance as a Carolina Rollergirl. As the best jammer of 2006 and MVP of quite a few interleague games, she makes a valiant effort but can't clear the pack by the time the clock runs down.

• Zella Lugosi posted 13 points, leading jammers, with Teflon Donna in second at 12.
• Ms. Fit had 15 blocks for the Debs but Faye Tallity had 12 for the Queens and Roxy Rockett had
  an amazing 21 blocks during this period.
• Only two skaters sat in the box this period for four minors, the cleanest match-up of the evening.
• Charla Main finished the night with no penalties, the only skater to do so.

Trauma Queens 25, Debutante Brawlers 19

Ninjas versus Pirates

As the Debutante Brawlers were short due to injuries, Marcy Killer from the Tai Chi-tahs and Fanta-C from the Trauma Queens skated as Debs during the first two periods as allies. During the third period, they each returned to their respective teams as the Queens challenged the Chi-tahs. The Queens had their vindication, a victory over the Debs... but the Chi-tahs had been the 2006 season champs. Was the period enough for them to get their game back together and pull out the win?

Queen jammer Penelope Bruz attempts to make it past Chi-tah pivot Marcy Killer.  (photo: sam bennett)

This period doesn't start so hot for the Chi-tahs. They start the first jam in a state of confusion and I have to send one of their skaters off as they don't have a pivot helmet cover (I'm a pack ref this period). The second jam is also hectic and chaotic for the Chi-tahs. This period, in general, is a mess of kinetic energy. Neither of these teams are as patient and calculating as the Debs, and it shows. We're giving out minor penalties like Meals-on-Wheels delivers food... as many as we can manage but we'd have given more if we had the resources. By the third jam there are nearly 20 minors on the board.

Also by the third jam the Chi-tahs seem to have gotten their act together. Scoreless in the first two, they make up for it in the third with an eight point jam by Betty Rumble that leapfrogs the Queen's six points. Both teams have buckled down a bit and settle into a rhythm. Unfortunately for the Queens, that rhythm involves low-scoring jams... but there's one jam where Princess America posts another eight for the Chi-tahs. That deficit is too much for the Queens and end the end the Tai Chi-tahs win.

• These gals didn't hold anything back. In a gritty, brutal and messy battle the Chi-tahs and Queens posted more penalties (49) than points (43) between them. Me-ouch!
• Marcy Killer and Fanta-C skated all three periods and each had one win and one loss from the first two periods; Marcy ended the night as the only skater with two wins and one loss.
• The Queens had a team average 58% lead jam percentage, a huge advantage over the Chi-tah's 32%
• Blocking was dominated by a single skater for each team - Violet Femme of the Chi-tahs had 16 blocks while Zella Lugosi of the Queens had 12.

Tai Chi-tahs 23, Trauma Queens 20

Ref. Voodoo
(photo: sam bennett)

And that folks, is that -- Cowgirls, Pirates, and Ninjas. Some shout-outs to some special peeps on the evening... I'm sure there will be folks I miss here, but I ain't perfect so let me apologize in advance if I miss ya.

• We were joined by Phil Arnold, professional derby fan and moderator of the Roller Derby Is Sport Yahoo group. Thanks for coming Phil; I hope we lived up to your expectations for Southern hospitality!
• Special thanks to Takillya Mahem, Sterling Maxwell, and the rest of our awesome crew who actually make these bouts happen. I can't name everyone on the bout production, track and other teams that do the magic behind the scenes but trust me, it is magic.

February was a bit of a break for us. March sees the season kick into action with a double header on the 11th featuring a guest appearance from the Atlanta Rollergirls (ARG!) and an away event in Philadelphia - the East Coast Extravaganza. So, tell all your kin-folk to come out for the March game for some Southern-style derby and, if you feel up to it, pack up the truck and head North with us to Philly for a full weekend of derby-goodness!

voodoo

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Don't miss the next bout!